Here is my take away from the recent election.

I will talk and I will listen about politics. I will no longer discourage the conversation. I will embrace the conversation, encourage the conversation, be curious not judgemental. Is it possible? It will take practice.

I’ve been a wreck. I’m so disillusioned. I’m questioning everything I believe in. I thought this election would ‘obviously’ turn out with the opposite results. I’m struggling to sleep. How do I not know my neighbors, my community, the issues that are important to people? I’m in my ‘bubble’. My bubble of ‘how could anyone vote for him’. Well, fuck; turns out lots of people want him as our president. Sixty-nine percent of the voters in my county voted for him.

On a quiet morning in my gym as I was doing my shoulder workout, a fellow gym rat was excited for the upcoming cold front. He told the gym owner; “I wish we had Montana winters like we had when I was a kid. That would run the democrats off”. I should have asked him what that means. I ignored him. Kept lifting. Why did I not have the conversation? I love a cold Montana winter. Lots of snow. Cross country skiing from my back door. All that snow makes for a better summer too. Why does he think democrats are warm weather people? And is that a bad thing? Another day the same guy was telling the front desk worker, all about how the government created the hurricanes. He talked for a long time on that one. It’s probably better that I NOT join in on that conversation. But next time I will. I want to know. I will listen. Maybe even get the guy to go “huh, I never thought of it like that”. Maybe.

I’m going to look for opportunities. Not to debate or argue. But to discuss. It’s so hard. How do I talk with someone who believes the election is rigged; unless their side won; then it is fair? I lean to this one sided thinking on my part; again. I struggle to have an open mind. This is why I need to talk. I need to listen.

I need to write a thank you note to Kamala. I was really excited about her running for president. She had enthusiasm, joy, experience; is articulate, educated, inclusive. I was really excited. Now I feel so defeated. So scared. So disconnected. I don’t want to live in a country based on hate and dehumanization. A country that is not inclusive. A country that is more interested in building walls and deporting people than being a global neighbor and helping others. I thought writing this would help. Writing is therapeutic. I feel worse.

And when I tell myself to relax, sit back, it can’t be that bad………he appoints a Fox news host as the leader of the military, the national defense, the Pentagon. What?! Am I in some reality TV show? Am I reading a dystopian novel? No. This is the real deal. But it is ok. Remember, this is what the majority of voters wanted. We followed the democratic process of choosing a president. I am an anomaly. Maybe I’ll become a republican. My husband and I are both white working class, non college educated; we fit the current profile. I could pretend to be a Trump fan, believe the government controls the weather, believe in Jesus, I mean, I am pro life, that’s why I don’t own a gun. I’m pro choice, but who isn’t for life? But wait. I should own a gun too? Defend myself from all the immigrants. Like the women who work at my granddaughters daycare. The largest employer of immigrants in the state of Montana. Whose children play with my granddaughter everyday. Who rocked her to sleep when she was an infant. Them. Out. And no more books about a kid having two dads in the libraries. Yeah. And I want billionaires to run the country. Trump, Musk and that other guy who are going to clean up all the superfluous spending. These guys will make America great again. UGH!!!! I’m not feeling it. I’m just a cynical old bitch. This isn’t helping anyone.

Let’s do something positive. Let’s stop complaining. Let’s keep moving forward.

First, listen to the podcast Assembly Required with Stacey Abrams, specifically the episode dated November 14 titled “Plotting Our Way Forward by Looking Back at History”. This is an action plan not a blaming or complaining conversation. Next read the book “Good Reasonable People” by Keith Payne. I just started it. This is a book about taking the steps to be “united” again, understanding what divides us, and how to have the conversation with each other. I challenge you to read this with me. All of you. All sides.

More great perplexing conundrums, adventures and book recommendations can be found at Wild About Books.